After The Fact

1/3/95, 11:30 pm

I am a foreigner. Those words seem ridiculously alien to me. But it's true. I'm a foreigner. God, what a thought. Up until a few months ago I honestly thought I would never travel outside the US. And who knows, maybe I'll never again. But for now I am a foreigner and I will evermore know that feeling, know how frightening that can be.

Today when we left the flat, Sergei had to go kick a homeless guy out of the building. He'd apparantly slept in the foryer, behind the elevator cage. The elevator didn't work, either, so we couldn't use it--we had to walk down the stairs, all 9 flights. As we passed the "vagrant" (what a word), I noticed that he'd urinated all over the floor and himself. I couldn't believe it--how pitiful. At first it struck me as another sign of how bad things here are for some people. But then I realized we have the same problem in the States. I myself have seen homeless people living in boxes infront of the White House in DC. The reason it struck me so differently was because here Sergei went out himself and kicked the guy out. In America we would have called the police rather than do it ourselves. We'd go back into our comfortable dwelling and sit and worry and otherwise ignore the situation past the door. I guess it's symbolic of what we do with all our problems. In DC, what did I do? I walked by as far away as possible. Today, I did the same? Yes, I did. The Russians didn't. If they treat all their problems the same way, maybe they'll do better than I've been thinking.

Another thing that struck me about this incident is that it wasn't some guy on a street, it was some guy in their building. Maybe that was what disturbed me so much. The idea that this guy could get ten feet from our door. Of course, odds are he simply needed to sleep off some bad vodka. But how are we to know that? I don't know what I'm going for here, what my point is. I just needed to write.

We went to the Bolshoi Theatre tonight and took in "The Tsar's Wife." It was incredible. Absolutely incredible. From even our dizzying height (we were in the 6th level) it was thunderingly loud and unbelievably beautiful. Karl said that it is a 200 year old theatre. 200 years. UNC is that old, but I still find it incredible that the stage we saw, and the balconies, and everything, have been a part of 200 years of Moscow--through the czars to Communism to modern democracy. Every time I turn around in this country, something new astounds me, good or bad. I find it darned incredible, to understate just a wee. Renee and I went out at one of the intermissions and had champagne--we felt utterly chic. It was great. And Kelly said the Bolshoi is ranked among the top 5 threatres in the world. Wow.

Speaking of Kelly, it just goes to show how entirely foreign we are here. Kelly was standing in the lobby when a woman walked into Kelly's elbow. "Oh, I'm sorry! I didn't mean to hit you in the tit!" Kelly said, then gasped at her own off-color slang. But then she realized that, hey, it didn't matter. Nobody here understands us anyway.

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